Happy 2011! I hope your year has gotten off to an amazing start. As this year begins, I see the term “New Year, New You†all over the place. I have even used this phrase myself in past years. The new year is after all, a great time to turn over a new leaf and re-create oneself.
Or is it?
Really, our job to become best version of ourselves, does this mean that we need to have a “new you†or a “true you� Is who you were last year not who you are this year? My current thought is that instead of creating a new you we should aim for the true you.
So who is the true you?
I have an old friend who I’ve recently been reunited with. She is currently in a relationship that is far less than beneficial. She walks on egg shells around him, second guesses herself and has lost herself within this relationship. Is this her? Well, parts of her yes. Does she need to create a new version of herself? No – she has already done that, and it isn’t really working. What she needs to do is to step back into herself, find herself and become her true self.
Easier said than done? Only if you don’t know who you are. The word we use for this in NLP land is congruence. Being true, whole and aligned with yourself.
If a person doesn’t know who they truly are, one way to figure it out is to identify what doesn’t fit and then find out what the opposite of that is, this will help you to find a desired state. For example, if my friend is feeling a lack of confidence in her relationship the opposite of this would be confidence. There is a good chance that if she were feeling confident she wouldn’t stand for the current relationship. While just knowing what you want isn’t the complete solution, it is the absolute first place to start. After all, if you don’t know where you’re going, you’ll go nowhere.
So my question to you as the first month of the year comes to an end. Who is the true you? I invite you to share your comments here on the blog and also invite you to make a pledge to yourself to become the True You in 2011.
To stand still for a moment and reflect might bring the realisation that we have been wired to conform, or to react according to what others might think, or just to follow the masses etc. In this time of reflection we might ask the question “Who am I”. The answer might be surprising and may well give impetus to moving in a new direction of realising the full potential of inner truths. Great article Heidi
My aim, which I set on course is to be in my Peter state as much as possible. This is my true me. I’ve noticed that at times when I’m the furtherest away from my congruent state I’m less productive, in everything. So it’s in my best interest to use what I learnt on course to keep to pete 🙂
Hi Pete – Its great to see that you are using your Peter State as a way of being. There is nothing better than just being you! Well done!
Some people get a bit scared of those inner truths – it means the possibility of living without masks and being true to oneself and everyone around. I can share from experience that instead of being scared, a more appropriate feeling may be joy and freedom!