One thing in life that seems to be constant is change. And with change comes choices. And choices lead to decisions.
How do you make decisions? Would you say you are a good decision maker? That it depends on the situation? Or do you suck at making decisions? (technical term, obviously!)
One more question…. How did you learn how to make decisions?
The answer to this one – first, from modelling others and second, by doing it yourself and amending (or not) from there. (more…)
In my last post I looked at The Second of A’s to Self-Coaching – Acceptance.
Once you have become aware of what is happening in your world of emotions, behaviours and thoughts and you have accepted what is happening; from this place, you can then notice alternatives and choices that may not have been in your awareness a few seconds before. Now, you can take action the third A. This might be moving in a different direction, changing your self talk or simply making a choice from Cause about the next move to make. (more…)
In my last post I looked at The First of A’s to Self-Coaching – Awareness.
Once you are aware of what you are doing, the emotions you have and the impact of all of that in your world you have the ability to see new choices.
But, we don’t just want to make a new choice right away. Delay the choice making for a few seconds. A knee jerk recaction to your awareness may just cause another problem – reaction is just another action to something that you have just done. Instead, once you become aware I invite you to accept what is happening and where you are, and your responsibility for it. Acceptance is the second A and a step that bring you closer to planned action, or pro-active choices. (more…)
Our life is controlled by our unconscious programming – and sometimes we only do the best we can based on the worst of our programming. When you notice yourself stuck in a loop, at effect of something in life, playing the blame game or just not heading in the direction you want this is a perfect time to stop and use the 3 A’s to self-coaching.
The three A’s are as follows: awareness, acceptance and action. (more…)
I do yoga quite often, and the instructors are continually reminding us to breathe. Especially when we move into a challenging posture – just breathe.
This is the same in life – sometimes when we move into something challenging we need to remember to breathe. And not just the normal breath we take (but if you are holding your breath, a normal one will do just fine!) I’m talking about a purposeful breath. A breath that lets you take a moment to check in and check out where to go next.
I’ve heard of this as a yogic breath, a 4 square breath, tactical breathing… here’s how it works… and if you can’t remember it – just take a deep, purposeful breath. (more…)
Not long ago I was out with a few friends and one of the group was starting to get a cold or flu. It was quite fun to watch what happened.
She was inundated by unsolicited advice: take garlic, eat lemons, cut out dairy, up the vitamins, drink tea, dance naked, use oils, eat soup.
People in general like to be helpful. Perhaps we gain some sort of significance by it.
One thing that I appreciate about most NLPers (and I say most because some are still getting the swing of it…) NLPers don’t give advice. We may share a metaphor or ask a few questions, but for many NLPers, advice is a no-no. ESPECIALLY unsolicited advice! (more…)