Jul

30

2012

Confidence: Just Be

I’m sure you have heard someone say this before “just be” – and phrases like “after all, we are human beings, not human doings”. You may have even heard that from me!

The million dollar question however, is “How”.

If “beingness” was so easy, wouldn’t everyone do it? Yes – and no.

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How many perfectionists do we have out there reading this? I’ll bet there are a whole bunch! I say this, because the world is full of them!

Perfectionism is one of those traits or behaviors that fully encroach and block the ability to be truly confident. In the 12 years I’ve been working with individuals, I am yet to meet a perfectionist who does the perfectionist thing because “it makes me happy”. Nope. Rather, “it needs to be perfect so other people will know I’m good”. Its for “them”; and too often, there really isn’t a “them”.

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Sensory acuity – that is the NLP term for “notice what is happening around you”; well, in simple terms at least. From an NLP perspective, when you are sensory acute, you are aware of macro and micro movements and changes that can clue you in on many things.

Unfortunately there are so many people (NLPers included) that lack sensory acuity. These are the people who keep following you well after you have finished a conversation, who keep talking although you look nearly dead due to boredom or who bring the complete opposite emotion into a situation and don’t notice.

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Confidence. It is one of those elusive emotions that some people exude, we all want, some people fake, others bask in it and some folks will spend their lifetimes looking for.  Is there a recipe for confidence? I actually think that there is…

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